"My Toes Look Like Cinnamon Donuts!"

Labor Day 2010 is now a fading memory and so is Summer Break 2010. School is in session for kids everywhere, and it is highly probable that one of their first assignments will be an essay or drawing titled, "What I Did On My Summer Vacation".  I could have used that as the title for this post, but it seemed too cliche. Instead,  I went with something very unique and original, just like the little person who uttered this silly sentence.

I view summer vacation as a must for every family with kids of any age. Whether it is a long weekend camping in a tent at a state park, visiting distant relatives, or globe-trotting to foreign lands with the kids, these experiences become the stories your children will tell friends, teachers, and eventually one day, their own children. Travel opens their eyes to new cultures, bizarre food, and the wonders of Mother Nature. Travel teaches children about flexibility, respect for others, and of course, the quirks of airport security. Travel expands their world beyond the comforts of home.  Travel is a classroom. 

Ever since I was a child, I have loved to travel. I remember donning my best dress to get on an airplane (I miss those days as I now see fellow travelers looking as if they just rolled out of bed). I remember feeling so mature and sophisticated when I received my first set of matching luggage at the age of thirteen (a 3 piece navy and maroon Samsonite set). I have so many memories of all those trips I took as a kid. I still love to travel and I enjoy it more when I can share it with my own kids.

Seeing that we have family and friends spread from coast to coast, we travel every chance we can - Spring Break,  Fall Break, Winter Break, and of course, the requisite Summer Vacation. (At this moment, Vacation by The Go-Go's is taking me back to 1982 in my mind.) This summer, my children, husband, and I went for a 2-week-long adventure in California. With family in SoCal, Los Angeles was a perfect starting point for our coastal drive to the north.  We took our time to take in the sites along the way. We trekked through several coastal towns like Santa Barbara, where after visiting there, I decided that the UCSB students are the luckiest (or perhaps the most spoiled) coeds in the world.  We toured the over-the-top luxurious Hearst Castle and imagined what life must have been like in its heyday.  In sharp contrast, we visited Alcatraz and imagined what life must have been like there too. We spent five days climbing the alpine-like streets of San Francisco, and I think each one of us left a little piece of our hearts there.  We strolled famous beaches - Pismo, Pebble, and Piedras Blancas - where we watched elephant seals spar, surfers dance on the waves and miniature crabs scurry as the tide rolled out.  We explored the groves of giant Redwoods in Muir Woods, in awe of all the natural beauty.  Outside of the unseasonably chilly temperatures and a little carsickness, it was the best vacation we have had to date, in thanks to my family for their "go with the flow" attitude and and zeal for spontaneity.  However, with all the fabulous and and famous places we visited, my favorite memory was hearing my 8 year old son so astutely say "My toes look like cinnamon donuts" as we were leaving the beach in search of the foot shower in Pismo. This image still makes me smile.

Every family has to make their own memories and adventure in the world. I just share mine with you to stress the importance a family vacation. Time away from the everyday routine of work, school, sports, and housework is needed by everyone in the family. Vacations bond a family with the shared experiences, inside jokes, and of course, the 704 photos that are taken along the way. When you really think about it...we have 18 years to hold onto our children before sending them out on their own, which means we have 18 summer vacations. However, you have to exclude the first few years, because the kids won't remember a thing. Also you have to exclude the time from 14 to 18 years of age because they think you don't know anything and would rather text or Facebook than explore the world with their parents. Despite all of this, take a family vacation every year, and in those middle ten or so years, savor them and create memories that will last a lifetime, and perhaps into the next generation too. Safe travels to you!

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Happy Mother's Day!!

With Mother's Day upon us, I thought that writing about this centuries-old tradition was in order. I have always believed that this over-commercialized holiday was the brainchild of the greeting card companies, but I was wrong. Countries, the world-around, have been celebrating their mothers for more than a millennium or two. England honored moms with Mothering Sunday held each year during the Lenten season. The ancient Greeks feted Rhea, the Mother of the Gods, while early Egyptians held an annual springtime festival to honor Isis, the Mother of the Pharaohs.  Back here in the USA, President Woodrow Wilson proclaimed, "Now, Therefore, I, Woodrow Wilson, President of the United States of America, by virtue of the authority vested in me by the said Joint Resolution, do hereby direct the government officials to display the United States flag on all government buildings and do invite the people of the United States to display the flag at their homes or other suitable places on the second Sunday in May as a public expression of our love and reverence for the mothers of our country." 

It has been 96 years since Wilson made Mother's Day a national holiday. So, I ask you, how did we go from displaying the flag as our expression of love and reverence for our mothers to lavish gifts of diamonds, flower bouquets, fancy greeting cards that play sappy songs, and brunch buffets at the country club? I personally love the simple gifts from my children. I especially adore their cards, tenderly crafted by hand with construction paper, glitter, and glue stick, and those sweet sentiments inside that come straight from the heart. Every year, with the help of their dad, my kids make a stepping stone for my garden. I now have quite a collection - all dated, decorated with shiny stones and other trinkets surrounding the little hand impressions. It is bittersweet to compare their hands from year to year...oh how they have grown! What is your favorite Mother's Day memory, gift, or activity you have with your children? Please share them with us.

For all the moms in the world, I wish you the happiest of days. May you have an endless supply of hugs and kisses from your kids. Enjoy this day because when these 24 hours pass, it will be all about them again. Happy Mother's Day!!

© Copyright The Baby Squad, LLC, All right reserved.

 

How Much Is Too Much? An Over-scheduled Kid

You know the saying that "time flies...", well I think my time boarded the Space Shuttle when I wasn't looking.  Does this mean I am having exponentially more fun? Maybe. It has been 3 months since I last posted. Writing posts has been on my To-Do list everyday since January 19th, but it somehow got pushed to the next day, the next week, and then, the next month. The reason for this was not from a lack of inspiration or content, as I have a folder of ideas for future posts. All I really can say is that life got in the way! I have two busy children, both involved in school, scouts, and swimming, not to mention birthday parties, sleepovers, and lots of homework. Our schedule revolves around these activities.  However, I am more than happy to be the party hostess, carpooler, and nightly homework checker. I am, after all, a mom.

Looking at the rainbow-colored days in my iCal, I have to ask myself, "How much is too much?".  Where do we draw the line on activities, sports, and other commitments our children have? My 10 year old daughter swims 6 evenings a week while my 8 year old son swims 4 evenings a week. They also have scouts on alternate weeks, which means someone always has a meeting to attend every week. This is their choice, not mine. Fifth grade track just started, and my daughter insisted on doing that too.   Last month, she qualified to swim in the Age Group State Championship meet. In preparation for that awesome opportunity, she swam 2+ hours each day, 6 days a week, and it was mandatory. Counting the days for meets and practices, she swam 23 out of 24 consecutive days. She missed one day because she had strep throat, which no doubt was brought on by an opportunistic bacterium combined with sheer exhaustion in the host. This meet was an experience of a lifetime for her, but it came with a cost.  She was tearful and stressed in the days leading up to the big weekend, and so was her mother. While at the State meet, I chuckled when I saw a fellow swim parent wearing a T-shirt that read "If I only had one day to live, I would spend it at a swim meet. They last forever!" By the end of the meet, she was so proud of her accomplishments and it was great to be part of the champion team. I was proud beyond words and thrilled to see her compete at that level. I was even excited to be her swim taxi. I am, after all, a mom.

So, how do other families handle kid's activities and maintain the balance of family life? I can't imagine the chaotic schedules of three or more children, like my friends. Are family dinners every night a thing of the past? It seems like sports have longer seasons and are more competitive than I remember at that age. Also, kids tend to play simultaneous sports or participate in both rec and travel leagues in the same sport.  Are kids choosing this for the love of the sport, the fun of friendly competition, or is it pressure from parents and coaches to be the best or to get that coveted college scholarship? Did you know that a young athlete has about a 0.00001% chance of being an Olympian? The odds of going pro are doubly better at 0.00002%. Having goals for children is a great thing, but unrealistic goals are detrimental to their developing psyche.  It is a known that most children who participate in sports and other activities excel in school, are less likely to experiment with drugs and alcohol, have a more positive self-esteem, and tend to be more successful as adults. However, all the positives of involvement in sports and other activities are negated by the pressure by parents, teachers and coaches to "do it all" and "be the best". 

Are your kids over-scheduled? Most likely they are. Mine are. This is fine because they enjoy what they are doing. I just miss the days when they were younger and life was easier in some ways.  After listening to parents in the stands at meets, in my neighborhood, and in my office, I believe that parenting is the newest competitive sport. I do not want to fall into that trap. I tell my kids it is OK to skip a practice or other activity occasionally, but at the same time I encourage them to follow through on their commitment they made to participate in a troop or on a team. There will be a day when all kids wake up and ask where their childhood went. I have to hope that when this happens to my kids, I can reply with "Time flies when you're having fun!".

© Copyright The Baby Squad, LLC, All right reserved.

Are You Smarter Than Your "Smart" Phone?

Today I write this post with a serious tone - no humorous anecdotes, no personal tales - just the sobering facts about a very deadly habit for the majority of drivers.  Do you talk on your cell phone (hand-held or hands-free) while driving? Do you text while driving? Do you Tweet or Facebook while driving? Do you read or answer your emails while driving? If you do, you are not alone.  A Nationwide Insurance public opinion poll found that 81 percent of people admit they text or talk on the phone while they drive. America has an addiction to cell phones, especially those "smart phones" that can do anything, anytime, anywhere - including your car. You may think that you are a great driver with a stellar record or that you are a mom who needs to multitask while driving carpool for hours each day or that it is only illegal if you are caught using your phone while driving (in the few states with hand-held cell phone bans) or maybe you are stuck in perpetual adolescence and believe that nothing bad will happen to you. The truth of the matter is, if you use a cell phone for any reason while driving, you are a distracted driver. Same goes for more than three-quarters of the people driving in their cars. around you and your family.  However this problem is not limited to just motorists in cars, but also train engineers, semi-truck drivers, and pedestrians too.  Put this all together and you have a recipe for disaster. 

The National Safety Council cited a 2003 study from the Harvard Center of Risk Analysis that estimated cell-phone use by drivers contributes to 6 percent of crashes, resulting in 330,000 injuries, 12,000 of them serious and 2,600 of them fatal, each year. It also estimated the annual financial cost of cell-phone-related crashes at $43 billion. As horrible as these statistics are, this problem has only worsened. More current trends show that nearly 500,000 people are injured and 6,000 are killed each year because drivers are distracted by using cell phones - either talking, texting and e-mailing.

Driving and cell phone use is not a new problem. Cell phones have been around for decades. In fact, in the late 1980's and early 1990's, cell phones were actually a life-saving device. Quick calls to emergency rescue teams meant early treatment for injured and ill people.  However by the mid 1990's, cell phone use exploded in popularity, and this life-saving effect was offset by the number of accidents and injuries caused by drivers using a cell phone. Back in 1997, the New England Journal of Medicine reported that cell phone use while driving is extremely dangerous and puts drivers at a four times greater risk for a crash. This habit is compared to drunk driving in terms of risk. A recent study published in the Human Factors: The Journal of the Human Factors and Ergonomics Society evaluated drivers under various conditions in a driving simulator. The test subjects were placed in one of four scenarios; one with no distractions, one using a hand-held cell phone, one using a hands-free cell phone, and lastly, one while intoxicated to the 0.08 percent blood-alcohol level. Although it was a small study, it demonstrated that drivers on a cell phone drove more slowly, braked more slowly and were more likely to crash. In fact, almost 10% of the drivers "collided" into the pace car while on cell phones. None of the drunken drivers crashed. So if research has shown us that driving while using a cell phone is as risky or possibly more than drunk driving, why haven't our state governments enacted a complete ban on their usage while behind the wheel. Drunk driving is against the law in all 50 states. Six states have a ban on hand-held devices but hands-free devices are still a distraction to all drivers, according to a University of Utah study.  If you want to know more about the cell phone laws in your state, please visit http://www.ghsa.org/html/stateinfo/laws/cellphone_laws.html. 

Now that you know the depth and breadth of this deadly addiction that you or someone you know may have, what are you going to do about it? The first step to changing any behavior is awareness. I hope that by reading this post, I have raised your awareness and that you will do your part to spread the word to others. We can not rely on the state legislation's agenda to make this a priority. We, as citizens, need to make this change come about ourselves. Yesterday, on The Oprah Show, Oprah spoke with guests who had lost a loved one in a cell phone related accident. She also featured a new organization, FocusDriven: Advocates for Cell-Free Driving. Similar to MADD, they are raising awareness of this all too tragic issue. If you watched it, I hope you took the poignant message to heart and pledged to make your car A No-Phone Zone. I did!  If you missed it, then please visit http://www.oprah.com/showinfo/Americas-New-Deadly-Obsession for more details and to make the No Phone Zone Pledge.  

"I pledge to make my car a No Phone Zone. Beginning right now,  I will do my part to help put an end to distracted driving by not texting or using my phone while I am driving.  I will ask other drivers I know to do the same.  I pledge to make a difference."

I promise you it will make you smarter than your "smart" phone.

© Copyright The Baby Squad, LLC, All right reserved.